Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Tea and Consent

This animation was shared by the Thames Valley Police to help 21st century sexual adults understand consent for sex. Take a look.





Clever and clear as to its meaning, the video gives several scenarios that a 21st century sexual adult could encounter with advice for how to parse a decision of whether to engage in the act of sex or not. It is also a video that is needed in this time of sexual confusion.



The  mores guarding the sex act have been roughly erased and written over time and again in the last 50 years. This video necessarily starts by equating the act of sex with the friendly act of tea. In this age of contraception and morning after pills, the act of sex might only have as many consequences as drinking a cup of tea.



Let's suppose a couple is fully protected with healthy non STD bodies and responsible contraceptive measures by both partners. Let's suppose both partners have previously engaged in intercourse with others and are not virgins. Let's suppose both partners are reasonably sober, they could legally drive, and that they are reasonably attracted to each other. What happens when they consent to have sex vs tea?



If they consent to have tea, their clothes stay on. If they consent to have sex, the highly personal parts of their bodies are given to the other. If they consent to have tea, they can enjoy friendly conversation and get to know the other person deeply. It is not near as likely for meaningful conversation to develop during sex. When the tea is over, there are no expectations of more than tea, its just a relaxing few minutes with a friend. This is not so clear with the sex act. Now some would say that this confusion stems from out dated morals that need to be forgotten. Yet, even a social Darwinist might concur that a sexually protected and promiscuous society is doomed to instability without some sort of procreation and stable family structure.



I understand the power of "Tea and Consent" to help in the day and age. I would add that the sex act is much more than "a spot of tea."